5 Years On - The Christchurch Earthquakes
Tomorrow is the 22nd of February. Exactly 5 years ago at 12:51pm, my life was completely flipped upside down and shaken about. Quite literally. Christchurch experienced an earthquake that measured 6.3 on the richter scale, only 5km deep. I was 11 years old.
To be entirely honest, I don't know what to say. I don't want to ramble on about my experience, because honestly, I am not sure that I'm ready just yet. So I am going to simplify my thoughts as best I can, and share what I think and feel. I know that this writing is jagged and blunt and has practically no structure, but that's the most sense I can make of the madness in my mind. My life was dramatically changed and I could never imagined it turning out the way it did.
I can't believe it has been 5 whole years. It feels like yesterday, I remember it that vividly. I heard my friends scream out of pure, raw fear. I thought I was going to die, and quite frankly, I thought I would never see my family ever again. Our home was damaged, but not bad enough that we couldn't live in it. So terrified, I had to go up to the 4th floor of our apartment, and sleep. I vividly remember lying on the floor next to my dad who slept in my bed ( my mum lay with my sister ), and every few minutes, there would be an aftershock. Most of them were probably over 5 on the richter scale, and I would jump awake and grip him tightly. I heard his voice calmly tell me, "It's okay, it's just another quake, you're safe and sound." I remember desperately trying to go to sleep, with adrenaline pulsating through me and I never let go of my dad's hand. This happened for months on end before I was brave enough to sleep by myself, because we never knew when the deadly quake would hit. I remember my mother racing and falling down our apartment stairs as she carried my sister, crippled by fear. I remember sleeping in doorways because it was the safest part of the house. I remember listening to Taylor Swift's Fearless Album in an attempt to calm myself, and drown out the earth shattering, rumbling sound. I remember not wanting my family to leave my side, because I thought it would be the last time I would see them. I remember always having a bag packed near my door. I would put everything I cherished and cared about in it, and if there was a quake that was big enough, that was what I grabbed, and we ran. I have so many negative memories from the quakes, but strangely, I also have so many positive ones.
I remember after the September quake, the old lady downstairs in our apartment block still had power in her home. So she baked, and baked, and baked. We were drowning in biscuits and slices, cupcakes and scones. I remember becoming so close with our neighbours, always checking that they were okay. I remember the sense of community and love that covered Christchurch like a blanket, even on the darkest of nights. I remember walking down the rotten and chaotic streets with my best friend, laughing as we jumped in the liquefaction and potholes ( which I don't recommend, although it was fun, we were almost swallowed by the sludge multiple times ). I remember going to school the day after a big aftershock and all of my friends and I would share our experiences, which brought us closer. I remember there being a quake immediately after the February, and I was in my horses paddock. My mum and sister were in the car when it hit. So, in the middle of the field, I started dancing. I laughed and I danced. In this delusional state I distracted myself, and made my sister laugh. In an instant, there was nothing that mattered more in the world than those I love.
I have learnt and grown from the earthquakes. It may have felt like the world was caving in on me, and sometimes it literally was, but I learnt a lot about myself, and about strength. Not only the physical kind, but the mental and emotional. Our ability to bend and not break constantly bewilders me. To this day I get panic attacks and flashbacks of the events, but I know I have to be grateful, because if there were no earthquakes, I wouldn't have met the wonderful, new, lifelong friends that I have. I wouldn't have been able to truly appreciate the true joys of life, because I know how dark and lonely this world can be. The Christchurch Earthquakes were a tragic and devastating event, that I will never forget. The sounds, the feeling, and the fear. So I just want to say, I am grateful for this beautiful day and I am grateful that I have a roof over my head, and food on my table. I am grateful for the friends and family I have surrounding me, and I am grateful to be alive. I am so eternally grateful.
Isla x
To be entirely honest, I don't know what to say. I don't want to ramble on about my experience, because honestly, I am not sure that I'm ready just yet. So I am going to simplify my thoughts as best I can, and share what I think and feel. I know that this writing is jagged and blunt and has practically no structure, but that's the most sense I can make of the madness in my mind. My life was dramatically changed and I could never imagined it turning out the way it did.
I can't believe it has been 5 whole years. It feels like yesterday, I remember it that vividly. I heard my friends scream out of pure, raw fear. I thought I was going to die, and quite frankly, I thought I would never see my family ever again. Our home was damaged, but not bad enough that we couldn't live in it. So terrified, I had to go up to the 4th floor of our apartment, and sleep. I vividly remember lying on the floor next to my dad who slept in my bed ( my mum lay with my sister ), and every few minutes, there would be an aftershock. Most of them were probably over 5 on the richter scale, and I would jump awake and grip him tightly. I heard his voice calmly tell me, "It's okay, it's just another quake, you're safe and sound." I remember desperately trying to go to sleep, with adrenaline pulsating through me and I never let go of my dad's hand. This happened for months on end before I was brave enough to sleep by myself, because we never knew when the deadly quake would hit. I remember my mother racing and falling down our apartment stairs as she carried my sister, crippled by fear. I remember sleeping in doorways because it was the safest part of the house. I remember listening to Taylor Swift's Fearless Album in an attempt to calm myself, and drown out the earth shattering, rumbling sound. I remember not wanting my family to leave my side, because I thought it would be the last time I would see them. I remember always having a bag packed near my door. I would put everything I cherished and cared about in it, and if there was a quake that was big enough, that was what I grabbed, and we ran. I have so many negative memories from the quakes, but strangely, I also have so many positive ones.
I remember after the September quake, the old lady downstairs in our apartment block still had power in her home. So she baked, and baked, and baked. We were drowning in biscuits and slices, cupcakes and scones. I remember becoming so close with our neighbours, always checking that they were okay. I remember the sense of community and love that covered Christchurch like a blanket, even on the darkest of nights. I remember walking down the rotten and chaotic streets with my best friend, laughing as we jumped in the liquefaction and potholes ( which I don't recommend, although it was fun, we were almost swallowed by the sludge multiple times ). I remember going to school the day after a big aftershock and all of my friends and I would share our experiences, which brought us closer. I remember there being a quake immediately after the February, and I was in my horses paddock. My mum and sister were in the car when it hit. So, in the middle of the field, I started dancing. I laughed and I danced. In this delusional state I distracted myself, and made my sister laugh. In an instant, there was nothing that mattered more in the world than those I love.
I have learnt and grown from the earthquakes. It may have felt like the world was caving in on me, and sometimes it literally was, but I learnt a lot about myself, and about strength. Not only the physical kind, but the mental and emotional. Our ability to bend and not break constantly bewilders me. To this day I get panic attacks and flashbacks of the events, but I know I have to be grateful, because if there were no earthquakes, I wouldn't have met the wonderful, new, lifelong friends that I have. I wouldn't have been able to truly appreciate the true joys of life, because I know how dark and lonely this world can be. The Christchurch Earthquakes were a tragic and devastating event, that I will never forget. The sounds, the feeling, and the fear. So I just want to say, I am grateful for this beautiful day and I am grateful that I have a roof over my head, and food on my table. I am grateful for the friends and family I have surrounding me, and I am grateful to be alive. I am so eternally grateful.
Isla x
Comments
Post a Comment